There is a scene in the movie Elf where Will Ferrell (who plays Buddy the elf) meets his dad (James Caan) for the first time. Buddy is dressed like an elf so James Caan thinks he is a singing telegram and tells Buddy to go ahead and sing. Buddy wants to please his dad so he begins to sing. It is out of key, impromptu and hilarious. Buddy sings at the top of his lungs and it is stream of consciousness kind of thing where mostly he just yells, "I love you, I love you, I love you". Last weekend I dropped my youngest daughter off at college. Just before we were about to leave she asked her mom to go with her to see her room one more time. Her room is on the first floor. I decided it was time to give her a memory. I stood outside her window and began to sing my own Elf like song. Mostly I sang, "I am Becca Coffey's dad and I love her, I love her, I love her. She may be embarrassed but that is ok because I still love her, I love her, I love her." It was off key, impromptu, and in a word...priceless. She appears to have recovered but her counselor can only tell us so much. A few minutes later we stood by the car and prepared to leave. I hugged her so hard tears leapt from my eyes. It was hard to let her go. She has been a jewel in our house and to be honest I meant every word I sang. It was another bittersweet moment that made me long for heaven. Almost everything about it was sweet. She was ready for college, she will thrive and love it, she is growing up just the way we hoped, and yet she was leaving us. As she walked away from the car to go back to her new home she walked away with some of my heart. It was a good sadness but it was sad nonetheless. Some day there will be no sadness. That means not just the real sadness of death and sickness and broken relationships. But there won't even be the bittersweet sadness where almost everything is sweet and yet. The bittersweet first day of school when you put your little one on the bus for the first time or the day you watch them drive off in a car for the first time alone, or when you drop them off at college or when you place their hand in the hand of another. I am reminded that heaven is my home and the place I was built for. Until that day I will savor the sweetness and let the bitterness remind me I am only on a journey and home is still a ways off.
Friday, September 11, 2009
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3 comments:
Joe,
I'm sure you've really hit home with a lot of parents doing the exact same thing over the past few weeks. We have 2 boys away at college right now (one in grad school), but every year I go through that whole bittersweet process of letting go again. We still have our daughter (the baby) at home, but I don't look forward to that last one leaving the nest. Thanks so much for reminding us that we have the promise of a day with no more tears or separation and that this is all temporal. We have quite a future to look forward to.
Tears drop as I read this, and your words remind me to love these few years left before we send our first to college. I am more thankful today with your reminder Joe, and oh, how I long for Heaven!
You must go through this every day as a pastor of HCC as you are their shepherd and God has given you a huge flock to shepherd. Praying for each and every one, watching what direction they go, entering into their joys and sorrows and loving every one of them as Christ loves them... His church.
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