Variables

I've been thinking about variables. I usually make decisions based on a few variables. Let's say I want to buy something. My variables are...need, price, pleasure, function and such. The thing I have been thinking about is...how many variables God works with. It has got to be astronomical. That is why I have to trust Him with everything. God is working with some pretty raw material when He is working with me and He is making something that will exist with Him forever. He is creating in me a "weight of glory". The original word is Kabod. It is a cool word. It means a heaviness, a solidity. I have really no idea what it takes to make Kabod. The good news is that God does. It may take cancer for all I know. I do know that I want Kabod. I want what God wants for me. Here is something cool though. A year ago, the elders decided to give me a sabbatical for rest, restoration and study. It is a huge and wonderful gift. I asked if we could wait until after Rachel's wedding. (By the way, picked them up after the honeymoon and they had a blast and looked great...it does a Dad's heart good to see his little girl happy in the arms of her new husband) Now, after the anonymous letter, some nasty accusations, some people deciding to leave the church, a wedding, house construction and my parents moving up...it looks like the perfect time for a sabbatical. Who knew? My Father in heaven who loves me decided a year ago that right now a sabbatical might be needed to make some Kabod in Joe. So, I continue to sit and be amazed at the love of the Father. The sun shines today and it is as much a gift for me as the first sunrise was for Adam. It is a gift for you as well. So, whether it is a sabbatical or a disease, I am trusting God to put the right variable together to create in me the weight of glory. Thanks for all your comments and your prayers. I will try to find a cyber cafe in Italy (yeah, that is where we are going...how great is that?) to keep you bloggers posted. Until then...ciao.

Sabbatical

For me rest is an elusive thing. I think it might be for most people but maybe particularly for ministers. Sunday is designed for rest and yet for me it is the day my work comes to a head. I am most exhausted at the end of a weekend. For pastors the saying seems to be more,"Thank God it's Monday". Any way, I was reading in the Old Testament and God explained the reason for the Sabbath. We are to rest because it "humbles your soul". I guess I never thought of it like that. There is something about work that makes one feel important. God says, "Take a day completely off and watch the world continue on without you. Do it every week so you remember that you really aren't that all important. Sit, sleep, rest, and watch how I do what I do and worship". The elders have decided to give me a sabbatical starting this next week. A sabbatical is an extended sabbath, an extended time to rest and restore. I think it will be good. I am not good at resting but I will learn. I know it sounds weird. I will miss all the day to day activity but I will look forward to watching God do His thing. The sabbath is designed to teach me more than I ever learn while working. So, the rest of you, enjoy the weekend, take some time off, we will humble our souls together this summer and keep our eyes peeled for the One, the Only One who never sleeps or slumbers.

The Fondness of God

Maybe it is the wedding but I have found myself thinking more and more about love. Particularly I have been captivated by the love of God lately. I find myself looking forward to getting up every morning. I remember hearing Brennan Manning tell the story of his Irish uncle who was standing looking at a sunset. Brennan went up and stood beside him and his uncle smiled and said simply," My Heavenly Father is very fond of me". I guess I have been feeling more and more like that since it struck me that God created everything for the pleasure of Adam. I sit in my chair in the morning with my coffee and look out at the sunrise and think, "My Heavenly Father really is very fond of me". It is a very cool way to start my day. There are only four ways to motivate me to change...guilt, fear (those two are pretty closely connected), pride, and love. Maybe for the first time or at least for the first time in a long time, I feel like I am being changed by love. I don't know how long this feeling will last but I have found myself smiling every morning as I sit listening and talking to a God who pulled the sun up on a string just to show me.

The Wedding that Waits

I think I understand why God has decided to have all of history end at a wedding. There is no greater avenue for love and joy and generosity and celebration to all meet together. After what I have experienced last night at the wedding of my dear daughter, I cannot wait until the day I satnd with all of you at the wedding feast of the Lamb and experience the joy and the love our Father has planned for us since the beginning of time. Do you have any idea how generous a father wants to be on the wedding day? The supper of the Lamb will be beyond anything we can imagine. I can't wait to see all of you there.

The Wedding Day

Today is the day of my daughter's wedding. The Coffey family had breakfast together this morning for the last time at least in this way. We huddled together after breakfast for a prayer and I don't know when I have ever been more grateful. God is a giver of all great gifts and he has given me a ton. I took Rachel to a place where we used to meet to have our father/ daughter time. It was an emotional and good time. Today will be an important day for her and an important day for us as her mother and I give her away. I think God loves weddings. They have everything He really loves...faith, love, joy, sacrifice and a high and holy promise. Today I am keeping my eyes peeled for Jesus. His first miracle was at a wedding and in the book of Revelation all of history ends at the wedding of the Lamb. So, I will be looking for Him to show up today in one way or another. And when He does, I am going to tell Him thanks. Thanks for creating family and daughters and weddings and the whole shebang and thanks for giving your blessing and enjoying it all as well. So, even if I am reduced to tears more than once, don't be fooled, I am not sad. Sometimes joy squirts out of my eyes. Today will be one of those days.

Two Fathers

Last night we had a pre-wedding party at our house. I think there were 23 of us. I sat on the deck and watched as my father and father-in-law talked. I think there was a lot of greatness and character on that deck. As children and grandchildren played basketball and badminton these two men sat and talked and laughed together. The two of them had influenced and shaped everyone running around my yard in one way or another. I thought of how 27 years ago these two men sat and talked with me to see if I was ready to marry. Dick Heasley ended up convinced and let me take his eldest daughter away. Now I stand at the threshold of giving my daughter away. Some day I hope to sit on a deck watching my children and grandchildren play. i hope to have the same impact on their lives these two great men have had on mine.
This morning I walked by Rachel's room and looked in on my daughter sleeping in her bed. Soon it will be my bed again and not hers. Her bed she will share with a man named Will. But this morning she is still mine and still in her bed in my home. I smiled. I have loved having her. She is one of the great gifts from God to me and having her one more night is precious.

The Last Talk

Today family begins to descend for the wedding. What a great day! Last night I gave Rachel and Will the talk I give all couples the last time we meet. I talked to them about M&M's, communication, sex, and the pure miracle of forgiveness. No marriage will survive long without frequent trips to a well of forgiveness. I think it was in the movie Love Story that the character says,"Love means never having to say you are sorry". That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard. Any way, you haven't really experience awkward until you sit with your wife, daughter and future son-in-law and talk about the wonder of sex. Really weird. I kept having to remind myself that sex was not my idea but God's. There is something sacred about losing yourself in the love of another under the safety of a covenant. So, God is about to bestow such a gift on my daughter and I was looking into the eyes of the one who would participate in the giving of that gift. I told them sex is a good barometer to let them know how the other parts were going. I told them to treat their marriage like their bodies. If they are sick for a couple of days then they will probably get better but if they are sick for 3 weeks they should see a doctor. If they are not getting along for 3 weeks then come and see someone. It was a good talk. I had to do it because the marriage license was sitting on the dining room table 10 feet away. I have signed more than 100 of those things but as I held this one in my hand it felt different. I looked hard at the names, felt the texture of the paper in my hands, took a deep breath and went in to have the last talk. So, today I am ready for all the confusion to start but every once in a while I will steal a glance at my daughter, wink at her, and let her know that I love her dearly and the best is yet to come.

Tuesday With Karen

This is the week of the wedding. On Friday my eldest daughter will walk into the church primarily my daughter and walk out primarily a wife. Today is the lull before the storm. Tomorrow, family starts to descend for the wedding. Today I will try to attend to my wife. To say that she has born the brunt of the burden of planning is a gross understatement. To say that she has born the brunt of everything is more accurate. She is the mother of the bride. She is the mother. That means she is the one who has poured herself out day after day for our family in general and our daughter in particular. If Rachel becomes like her Mom as a wife then Will will be one happy man. I have great hopes for that since there is no one Rachel wants to be more like than her Mom. It is one of the things I love about both of them. Karen being the kind of woman worthy of emulation and Rachel having the wisdom to want to pick out a good role model. Any way, my goal for today is to look hard into my dear wife's eyes and see how she is really doing with all this. I need to see if she is saying goodbye in her heart to this chapter and if she is ready to embrace the next. Proverbs talks about a good wife in glowing terms. "The heart of her husband trusts in her", so says Proverbs 31. I have never trusted anyone more than Karen. Today I just want to hold her hand and have her trust me and give her the strength and the love she will need for this good week.

The Love of a Father

If all goes well, by the end of this week my eldest daughter will be married. It is really strange to see things addressed to Rachel McGinley instead of Rachel Coffey. It makes me feel like she is role playing because deep down she knows she is really a Coffey. But on Friday she will be Mrs. McGinley as surely as my Karen is Mrs. Coffey. This whole process has got me thinking a lot of my father-in-law. What in the world was he thinking when he gave me his daughter's hand nearly 27 years ago? Did he see something in my eyes that allowed him to sleep at night? I would suppose no one has prayed more for me than Karen's dad these last 27 years. I will be praying for Will McGinley for I will be trusting him with a very great treasure come Friday. These past few weeks I have felt the love of a father burning with a greater intensity. I like that for a couple of reasons. First of all, being a father is one of my favorite things in the whole world and then secondly, for just a few moments my heart beats a little closer to God. Out of all the ways God could describe His love for me, He has chosen to use "father". This week I expect to understand a little more about God's love for me as my father even as I place the hand of my precious daughter into the hand of a man who is making a promise to love her even more deeply than I. So, I pray.

It's Just a Game

I can't really figure out how to draw some spiritual truth out of this but...HOW ABOUT THOSE CAVS!! I am usually in bed before 10pm and last night I stayed up to watch the whole game like a big boy. It was one of the only times it was worth it to stay up past midnight. That's all I have to say. More spiritual stuff later.